Tuesday, 24 November 2009

I do what the rice krispies tell me to do!

You won’t see me write this that often; I’ve had a cracking day at work. I was let loose in the workshop and got to play with the band saw. Oh such fun! Every time I go into the wood work area I look at all the machinery such as big drills, cross cut saws, table saws, belt sanders and the like I cringe. Particularly when I see any of the guys using them, I should think to myself “wow, they’re really empowered” instead I find myself thinking “dear god that’s a hand gone!” it’s even worse when I see someone using a lathe, I mean a length of wood spinning at 1500 rpm could strip the skin off your arm. The band saw is one or more lost finger and as for the belt sander, let’s not go there. Fortunately the workshop instructors are amazing, health and safety is the number one priority. The worse injury we’ve had in all the years I’ve been there is a splinter. Now I’m no expert, but I think that’s a fairly fantastic track record. So today I got to play with these instruments of pain and death. I can almost envision my faithful reader on the edge of his/her seat in anticipation of what I did in the workshop, well wait no longer. I was cutting out wooden animals. I can do carpentry me. Maybe I was the son of a carpenter in a past life! Hmmmm! I dunno, all these new found skills that are coming to the fore, I can do gardening, carpentry, and yesterday I repaired a leak in the ceiling of the numeracy & literacy room. Damn, I should hire myself out as a handy man, if it’s broke I can fix it, well, sort of, I can bodge it to the best of my abilities. You’re impressed I can tell.

So on to a different subject, do you know what a 419 is? Well it’s an e-mail that you get from some poor sap who claims that they are the heir to a not unsubstantial fortune. Several million to be precise. Well they send you a mail and relate a tale of woe about how their parents, husband, wife was killed by some very dodgy people and they now have to get shot of the money before the bad guys catch up with them and get their mucky little mitts on it. So they ask you to provide your bank details so that they can make a goodwill deposit to show how genuine they are. Oh how I chortle when I get these. And I have such fun with them. Sending fake bank details is hilarious. They get really stressed and tell me that they’re gonna get me and my families, always worth a giggle.

Three days until the weekend, tomorrow’s hump day, not as rude as it sounds. When Wednesday’s over and done with it’ll be the downhill run to Friday.

My wedding plans have encountered a hiccup and we may have to put it back a bit, oh she’s gonna be miffed when she reads that. It looks as if I won’t be taking new wifey and stepson off to Lyme for a few days. The way things are looking we may have to settle for a weekend at new beach. Seriously though we must sort the whole shebang out, madam’s getting fretty and I think the fact that I’m remaining laid back about the whole thing is bothering her. Something will come up and everything will be fine. There is a strong possibility that I’ll be eating my words in a few months, and an even stronger chance that I’ll have a few bruises after herself has read this paragraph. Tee hee!

Well I’m off to try out my new found skill of saving the planet, saving the planet from the evil that is chocolate, and as for the vile doughnut of doom, I shall end its reign of terror.

Wish me luck faithful reader, ‘tis a rotten job, but someone’s gotta do it. Hand me the spoon, for I see the fruit trifle of despair approaching. Have at thee foul beast!

Splat, squelch, nom, nom, nom aaaaaaargh. The dreaded curse of indigestion, but I shall soldier on!

there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophies!

I was recently asked what made me want to start up a paranormal research group. To be honest there’s a couple of reasons, the first is simple, those who know me well will know that my interest in such things has been long. I’m open minded to these things but I think I’ve also become a little more sceptical in my progressing years. Secondly, and here’s the odd bit, recent events have triggered my interest again. Back in the summer I was frying a couple of eggs, I was stood in the kitchen, on my own, as I went about the business of egg frying; I heard a distinct voice say “food!” I’m not easily spooked but I did have a shiver run down my spine. Another event happened at night, a few weeks later I was in bed all snuggled up and dozing off. I was thinking to myself that I should take the covers off for a bit as I was getting too warm. Moments later they removed themselves. Now I’ve put this down to the fact that I was half asleep and as I moved I made the quilt fall. Sometime later, again in the kitchen, I heard the sound of cutlery being rattled on a plate. I’d not long had dinner and the plate was on the side waiting to be washed up. When I went to the kitchen to make a cuppa I looked at the plate and wondered if the knife and fork had been placed on the plate together or spread apart as they now appeared. Having read many publications on the subject, I decided to do a simple clearing. So of I trotted to my local Wiccan outlet and purchased the necessary bits. As I went to pay for them, the nice young lass in the shop asked if I had a problem. I asked what she meant and she pointed out what the things I was buying could be used for. I told her about the three events, to which she suggested that I offer a choice. She went on to say that I should ask if he/she/it meant any harm and that I should ask three times. She was adamant that I would get some form of response. If I was uncomfortable with the provided response I should ask it to leave. If anything happened after that which made me ill at ease, I should do a clearing, if not then leave it be. So armed with this newly gained knowledge I pootled home and carried out the instructions. So far I haven’t needed to do the clearing and there’s been no further activity. But the interest is still there and every now and then I catch movement in the corner of my eye. But it no longer bothers me.

I realised on Sunday that I’m getting old. The 22nd of this month was my daughters 22nd birthday. The last time I saw TJ she was six. I was 23 when she was born and she was the most beautiful thing I have ever had the good fortune to look upon. I have absolutely no idea where she is or what she’s done with her life, but I think of her often, and I truly hope that I will one day get the chance to tell my precious little girl how much I love and miss her.

So the day closes on a bit of a sad note this time, rant free and somewhat restrained by my usual standards. Oh well. I’m sure I’ll be back to normal soon. Back to the shop on Saturday so I’m sure the pleasantness of 20 screaming 13-15 year olds will provide plenty of reasons to rant. There’ll also be a chance to catch up with my friend who was hurt in a fire last week.

Ta ta my little silver skin pickled onions.

Sunday, 22 November 2009

Seven deadly sins Seven ways to win Seven holy paths to hell, And your trip begins

What an interesting weekend thus far. After work I had a pootle around the local ASBO, I need a new mouse for the laptop, I got the current one there and there’s a loose connection in it so it needs replacing, of course they had none in stock so I’ll have to wait or find an alternative. My visit to ASBO’s beings fruitless I went home. I had every intention of doing a bit of sorting out before the lads arrived. However, the Jedi master that is Obi Kat Kenobi had other plans. I got in, sat down for a quick cuppa and ended up being assailed by the mogs, bless ‘im. Two of the guys arrived at around 18:39ish, then the third member of our party arrived, albeit a bit under the weather. So we started to set about with killing of nasty beasties. Then I got a text from the missus saying that she was on the phone to the rozzers, my immediate reaction was unprintable to say the least. Anyhoo it transpired that some twat faced hoodie wearing drain on humanity had tried to make off with her bag. Fortunately the low life had no luck as her royal gorgeousness smacked him round the head with her key chain, I knew that’d come in useful at some point. The twonk squealed a profanity and made a run for it. He got off lightly if you ask me. Of course herself is a little guilt ridden for her violent outburst, I, on the other hand, feel the little shite should have been kicked square in the nuts. Anyway, due to my betrotheds dismay we drew the evening to a close and headed up to spend the evening with her. One good thing was that I got to see the Doctor Who preview on CiN last night. Saturday morning I headed home to await the arrival of manky Llewellyn Bowen, nippy chippy, Boo and last but not least foreman Matty. They were coming down to carry out some maintenance work on the house. Now I’m totally useless at this sort of thing, but I managed to do a bit of gardening, well, I say gardening, what I mean is, picking up the rubbish and putting it in the bins. I also got stuck in with the repair work on the stairs. I was squeezing thick sticky white stuff on the gaps. This resulted in a great many humorous comments, all of which are also unprintable, but I’m sure you get the gist. The changing room’s team left around midday, so I lounged on the sofa with my cat and caught up on this week’s Bones, Lie to Me and two episodes of Merlin. Then back up to casa el Birdos, collecting a fine meal of kebab meat and chips on the way, DTWP likes kebab meat. After sitting through the mindless twaddle that is X Factor, (Stacey, woof!) we watched 300. Sodding good film that.

Payday at the end of the week and there’s a couple of films out that I plan to buy, the primary one is the new trek film, also a sodding good film. I may also get terminator salvation and land of the lost.

I had a message from the shop today, it said that my friend who was hurt in a fire earlier in the week is out of hospital and up and about, although his right arm is described as “a mess” it’s good to know that he’s ok and on the road to recovery. I look forward to seeing him next Saturday. I also have to head into water stones as it was a very good friends birthday Saturday, so I shall get her a book token, they always go down well. I also need to sort out a card and contents for a friends little lass. A tenner shall be winging its way to Surrey soon.

So that leaves Sunday to go, I don’t anticipate much happening except a trip home to spend some time with the mog and perhaps a spot of painting, even if only to finish off the Terminators that have been a WIP for the last 3 months, I’ll be glad when this lots finished.

So that’s it for now.